Before you can "stand with" anyone, you need to learn to stand up (for yourself)

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Written by: Miri
March 15, 2022
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About ten years ago, when I was flat-sharing with a friend in London, I came home from work one day in a state of outrage (which was not uncommon given the particular environment I was employed in at the time). I detailed my outrage to my flatmate, and the flurry of fury that had been directed at my employer as a result, and my flatmate was quiet for a moment, then shook his head and chuckled, "wow."

"What?" I said.

"You get really annoyed when people treat you badly, don't you?"

"Er, yeah..," I replied, somewhat thrown. "I'd say that's a fairly universal phenomenon..."

"Oh no, it's not, not at all," said my flatmate airily. "I get treated badly all the time."

"Er, okay.. And what do you do about it?"

"Nothing. Most people just do nothing. That's why it's weird you get so annoyed about it."

He wasn't joking or being satirical - he was actually really surprised, and somewhat mystified, that it bothered me so much to be mistreated, and that I would respond by standing up for myself rather than just being walked over - and his reaction, I realised over the years, was ultimately completely unsurprising - because such an inordinate amount of energy and resources have been poured by the ruling classes into trying to get us to internalise the belief that we are nothing, and therefore to behave accordingly. To not have any standards or self-respect or real principles, and certainly not to be prepared to robustly stand up for them and for yourself - because, just who the hell do you think you are? How dare you stand up to your boss, or your doctor, or your tyrannical government trying to impose a state of perennial jack-boot slavery upon you? Know your place and shut your face! That is the attitude we are all brought up to conform to from birth.

Consequently, I have noticed that, all through this "pandemic", what seems to enrage my hate-fans the most, is not my opinions as such, but that I dare to think that they matter. That I dare to think that I might be important enough to matter, too (hence that sparkling and original gem of wit and wisdom they always come up with whenever I express any opinion counter to the state narrative: "oh, are you a scientist then?" Translation: scientists are real people, important people, THEY matter, not like YOU).

The insidious approach state officials and their minions and acolytes have taken all throughout "the pandemic" is to try and shame their opponents into silence and compliance, by insinuating that if you don't meekly comply to their diktats, then you are a Bad Person - and the reason you're Bad is that you dare to think of yourself.

"I don't want to live in solitary confinement under house arrest whilst banned from working and seeing friends, being forcibly masked and nasally assaulted. I find this unacceptable," you might argue.

"OH MY GOD," comes the immediate, seething response. "Don't you know grannies are DYING?! What kind of monster are YOU?! How dare you think of yourself at this terrible time?!" - translation, only other people matter. You don't and don't you dare think for one moment that you do.

Exact same rhetoric is now being applied to the new cultural icons of the moment, the Ukrainians. Of course, THEY matter, THEIR suffering, trauma and displacement matters, but yours? The hideous struggles you have undergone these past two years, the family and friends you've lost (either figuratively or literally or both), the colossal hit to your earnings, your damaged and traumatised children? Irrelevant. How DARE you think of yourself at a time like this, don't you know Ukrainians are DYING?!

Translation, yet again: you don't matter. Only other people do. Your only role is to accommodate others and bend over backwards for others and give, give, give until you're drained dry and can be disposed of, like the expendable commodity you are. Because you, you're nothing and worthless and contemptible and have no worth other than being used by other people and obeying your betters.

This, by the way, is the precise approach malignant narcissists take to other people, and this is no coincidence. It's because our world is run by malignant narcissists, and as above, so below - they've filtered their values down to the populace as a whole, and so the vast majority of people are functioning as if they are the victims of long-term narcissistic abuse - because they are. That is the only reason anybody would think that they themselves, their own feelings, needs and preferences, are an irrelevance that should perpetually be invalidated at the altar of other people (including complete strangers from other countries), and that to dare to try and assert yourself at all is an act of egotistical abomination.

This is precisely the kind of cynical and devious malevolent manipulation behind hypnotising the masses to put up Ukrainians in their homes - yes, on the surface there's a lot of virtue signalling going on - "oh, look what a shimmering beacon of kindness and compassion I am welcoming this stranger into my home. Look! Look! ARE YOU LOOKING?!" - but where that comes from is a place of completely shattered self-esteem and pathetically withered and shrivelled self-respect - which, by no coincidence, are also the traits necessary to muzzle up like a dog because someone "more important" than you tells you to, and to clap like a performing animal on your front door step when told to by the TV. Virtue signalling is a veneer for an empty vessel, someone who does not value themselves and can only define themselves by doing what they're told by their masters. Their own sense of self has never properly developed (school is key in ensuring this kind of retardation reliably takes place - after all, why do all governments of the world take such a keen interest in incarcerating children for all of their most formative years?) - and this is why such people cannot think or moralise for themselves, and are therefore one minute refusing to let their own family come round for a cup of tea because they're unvaccinated, and the next welcoming unvaccinated strangers to live with them indefinitely.

It's because ultimately these people - the masses, the majority - don't believe that they matter, and that they are therefore permitted to form thoughts and principles of their own. If you don't believe this - and you don't learn how to robustly defend yourself and your thoughts and your principles - then you just become a rootless empty shell, jerked this way and that by the media and politicians - nothing more than a ventriloquist's dummy, a mouthpiece for others more powerful than you.

I would never contemplate letting a Ukrainian stranger live with me as this would be an extraordinarily impractical and risky imposition on my life and my life is important and I put it before the needs of random foreign strangers. To imagine that this would be a controversial statement and that I would be condemned as heartless and selfish for having enough self-respect to put me and my loved ones before complete strangers, is utterly preposterous and indicative of just how broken and lost the UK populace is.

The masses are, as we know, also under a deep form of hypnosis and mind control, but perhaps to be susceptible to this, you must first have shattered self-esteem and be ultimately empty - so the dark overlords can fill you up with all their commands and spells. I've seen some people affect pseudo-outrage about housing Ukrainian strangers, claiming this is nothing to do with virtue signalling or media manipulation, but that they "deeply care".

Can you explain, then, if the UK is so full of all these deeply caring people who are quite happy to let complete strangers from traumatic backgrounds live with them, why there is such a dire shortage of foster carers in this country? Why so many people "deeply care" about Ukrainian strangers, but not vulnerable UK children in their own communities?

In foster caring, you will be matched with a child who speaks English, is from the same geographical area as you, and is from a similar cultural background. Yet almost nobody is interested in doing this and there is always a desperate shortage of foster homes.

Meanwhile, someone from thousands of miles away who you can't communicate with and is from a totally alien culture, you'll welcome them without a moment's hesitation? Why? Why do they take priority over the needs of UK children who live down the road?

Of course, these questions are rhetorical because I know the answer. The answer is that the media hasn't launched an all-out assault aggressively brainwashing people regarding the dire plight of children in foster care, so the masses do not care about them, because they have no principles or moral standards of their own. They only care about what the media tells them to care about, because their own self-worth hasn't developed enough for it to be otherwise. To genuinely care about other people, you have to care about yourself first. If you don't, you're just operating from a place of shattered self-esteem where you don't believe you matter and so can only claw back any sense of self-worth by serving people your masters tell you do matter (hence why white liberals claim to care so much about BLM, but hate any black people who oppose the BLM narrative). This is classic saviour complex stuff, and saviour complexes typically result from abusive or neglectful childhoods where the child was taught to sublimate their own needs in order to serve the various narcissists in their lives.

Unfortunately, we live in a society run by and for the benefit of psychopathic narcissists, so this is not something any of us have escaped entirely. I had the typical low self-esteem, people-pleasing personality in my teens and early twenties, until the job I mentioned at the beginning of this article taught me the invaluable lesson of standing up for myself. I don't know whether it was a hormonal switch as I completed adolescence or just the fact that this job was so utterly ridiculous (we weren't even allowed functional chairs and the whole office was served by broken ones that had been acquired from a skip), but I felt something strengthen and grow and fire up when I got to around 25, and realised that I did matter and if other people tried to treat me like I didn't, I would be very, very displeased about it - and express my displeasure to them.

And, honestly, normies and hate-fans HATE that, more than any specific view I might hold. The spluttering indignant outrage comes not from WHAT I think but that I have dared to think anything at all, rather than just mindlessly repeat the "good person opinion" as dictated by the media, e.g., in this instance, "of course I will welcome Ukrainian strangers with open arms and let them live rent-free in my house indefinitely! What kind of cruel monster wouldn't?!"

I have poked around a bit more regarding this whole "adopt a refugee" scheme, and the more I investigate, the more obviously sinister it is. First of all, to develop a comprehensive international programme to re-home thousands of people is not something that can be knocked up in a couple of weeks, since this conflict supposedly started. Rather, this is something that has been developed over many months, - so, it's all part of the pre-planned and pre-scripted agenda.

Second of all, the programme makes it clear that, while Ukrainians will be 100% eligible for benefits and work (and virtue-signalling UK corporations are falling over themselves to offer employment), their hosts are strictly prohibited from ever charging them any rent.

So, you've got someone living with you who can work full-time, keep all the money, and not pay any keep - and you think these people are ever going to leave?

Look carefully at the government's website, and try to find any information at all about what the plan is to transition these people out of your house and into their own lives.

There isn't one. Because this is not meant to be some transient, temporary thing, it is meant to be permanent and it will be. You may be surprised at how few legal rights you have where it comes to evicting unwanted guests. Once people are legally recognised as living in your home, they are very, very difficult to get out again - and what kind of monster would evict saintly Ukrainian refugees anyway?!

There is no contingency plan on the government's website as to what will happen if these arrangements go wrong (which they will in the vast majority of cases) and you want the Ukrainians to leave.

And what happens if there's another lockdown? What happens if the largely unvaccinated Ukrainians are blamed for a "new wave" and the country goes back into lockdown and you are under house arrest with unwanted guests with no escape options?

I implore anyone even considering this to step back and really think. To let a traumatised foreign stranger live with you is a monumental decision as significant as any you will ever make. This being the case, the government is revealing itself and its ultimately deeply malevolent intentions by rushing you into this by creating a sense of urgency and bombarding you with appeals to emotion that don't give you time to properly think. This is exactly what scammers do. Bombard and overwhelm your emotions without giving you time to engage your critical faculties and think. We have immediate emotional knee-jerk responses to heart-rending footage of photogenic families fleeing desperate situations, and the 44,000 people who crashed the government's website yesterday saying they will let these families live with them are acting only on this manipulated emotion, they are not thinking. Most of these 44,000 people have not even asked themselves whether these families can speak English.

No ordinary person has anything like the skills or resources necessary to deal with the multifaceted and complex needs of traumatised foreign strangers who can't speak the language, and so letting these people come and live with you is going to be an unmitigated disaster for you and for them. This is obvious. Traumatised displaced refugees need teams of experienced and highly skilled professionals to ensure a smooth transition into an alien culture, no ordinary family is remotely appropriately equipped. And professionals get vitally needed time off and holidays. You won't.

However, as Ukrainians are promised indefinite free accommodation with you and as there is no plan about transitioning them into their own homes, they will have very little incentive to ever leave. The consequences for you and your family of being stuck with complicated, and possibly dangerous, strangers from an alien culture long-term or indefinitely, are unfathomable.

So, even if you've never done so before, now is the time to draw up some boundaries and put yourself and your family first. If you can't do that - if you can't stand up for yourself and the people closest to you and protect and prioritise them - then "standing with" Ukraine (or anywhere else for that matter) is revealed for what it really is - empty posturing and meaningless virtue signalling programmed into you by the ruling classes because it serves the next very, very nefarious stage of their agenda.

Stand up for yourself. It's time.

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3 comments on “Before you can "stand with" anyone, you need to learn to stand up (for yourself)”

  1. Well written and very real point of view. I will print this off and pass to anyone who us thinking about taking in a Ukrainian.

  2. I'm in complete agreement with you-I'm finding the mindless, unconsidered standing with Ukraine stance unbearable. Perhaps because its so clearly reflecting the level of mass psychosis , the conditioning and indoctrination. And now, this insane willingness to act as saints and martyrs in opening up ones home and life to complete displaced and traumatised strangers of wildly varying personalities, principals and morals is like a demonstration to the overlords of just how far they can go with their lunatic requests.

  3. Yes it is quite amazing to behold how ludicrous the vast majority of Britons have become. They have never grown up, stuck in arrested development. I don't know how to wake these people up. You need to be a specialist in cult deprogramming techniques to be able to even make a start on it.

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